Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Thursday, September 6, 2012
Oh sorry, my bad!
Oh I'm sorry.... i thought we were called the United States of America, not the Divided States of America. I am so sick of members of the Republican Party putting members of the Democratic Party down and vice versa! It is completely riddickulous. Why do we have to be so hostile to each other? Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and vote for the candidate they think is best. I am a strong supporter of posting facts about what a candidate is planning to do and how they will do it no matter what party. I am NOT a supporter of people who post incredibly rude things about the opposite party.
And why can't the candidates just say what they are going to do and how they are going to do it and what the effects might be instead of streaching the truth out... a LOT. All candidates for all parties do that and it is just way out of hand.
I guess this post is mainly trying to say, remember who we are. We are Americans. We are free to have an opinion and share that opinion. It is also a reminder that we need to stay United as a country and not go against each other and say mean things about what another person believes in.
Thanks for reading.
And why can't the candidates just say what they are going to do and how they are going to do it and what the effects might be instead of streaching the truth out... a LOT. All candidates for all parties do that and it is just way out of hand.
I guess this post is mainly trying to say, remember who we are. We are Americans. We are free to have an opinion and share that opinion. It is also a reminder that we need to stay United as a country and not go against each other and say mean things about what another person believes in.
Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Reconnecting
aw.. me and my roommates did his hair all pretty. :P
Monday, July 23, 2012
Old post i saved and never posted
06/2011
"Sometimes doing something that you know you HAVE to do really hurts. Sometimes you wish there was some way around it, but there is no way. Like with me, today, i had to break off a friendship with my ex boyfriend.. lets call him Elmer (obviously that is a fake name) because of some personal issues. I tried so hard to think of any way that i could just deal with it. But then i thought i could hurt a little bit more everyday of the rest of our friendship, or i could break it off now and hurt a ton for a little while and then move on with my life. I don't regret breaking off my friendship with Elmer. but that doesn't mean that i don't miss him, it doesn't mean that i am not going to have unimaginable hurt going on inside of me. He was the first guy i had ever loved and so it is very hard for me. BUT i had to do it. So i have a couple of feelings inside of me....i feel relieved, like a load has just been lifted from my shoulders, happy, and i also feel sad and hurt."
It is now July of 2012. I don't know what i was thinking when i wrote that. I still hurts with every passing day. Why?? i don't know. It is stupid, but i just can't get over it. I made a mistake that i can never take back. I wish he was still my friend. We used to go to midnight movies spur of the moment. We used to watch really weird movies. We used to drive around aimlessly. We used to go to IKEA just for fun. We used to hang out a lot. he used to give me his famous half smile. We used to just play around. I miss that. I miss his laugh, and his Joker imitations. I miss the dimple on his cheek when he smiles. imiss seeing him wear his fedora. i miss seeing how he loves his little brother. I miss seeing how he loves his whole family. i miss him talking about doing extreme sports. i miss him making me eat things i don't like. i miss his shoes (weird). i miss the mischevious look in his eye when he thinks he has a brilliant idea. I miss how he looks dumb after he wasn't able to do something he thought he could :). I miss him bringing me pepermint ice cream on Valentines day. I miss how his nose runs (again.. weird but so true). i totally miss his notebooks and his black coat. and his love for the rocketeer and peter pan. well... you get the gist of it i think. I have to get over it. But how do you get over five years of being close to someone. how do you get over loving someone for five years? you don't! you can't just get over it. It eats at my mind and emotions everyday, even when i don't invite it. I regret breaking the friendship off, and i still miss him. And i am hurting every day anyway so it wouldn't have made a difference. At least i would have still had him in my life. I had to put my feelings out there somewhere. cuz i am going insane keeping it inside.
I will post something positive soon.... i promise!!
"Sometimes doing something that you know you HAVE to do really hurts. Sometimes you wish there was some way around it, but there is no way. Like with me, today, i had to break off a friendship with my ex boyfriend.. lets call him Elmer (obviously that is a fake name) because of some personal issues. I tried so hard to think of any way that i could just deal with it. But then i thought i could hurt a little bit more everyday of the rest of our friendship, or i could break it off now and hurt a ton for a little while and then move on with my life. I don't regret breaking off my friendship with Elmer. but that doesn't mean that i don't miss him, it doesn't mean that i am not going to have unimaginable hurt going on inside of me. He was the first guy i had ever loved and so it is very hard for me. BUT i had to do it. So i have a couple of feelings inside of me....i feel relieved, like a load has just been lifted from my shoulders, happy, and i also feel sad and hurt."
It is now July of 2012. I don't know what i was thinking when i wrote that. I still hurts with every passing day. Why?? i don't know. It is stupid, but i just can't get over it. I made a mistake that i can never take back. I wish he was still my friend. We used to go to midnight movies spur of the moment. We used to watch really weird movies. We used to drive around aimlessly. We used to go to IKEA just for fun. We used to hang out a lot. he used to give me his famous half smile. We used to just play around. I miss that. I miss his laugh, and his Joker imitations. I miss the dimple on his cheek when he smiles. imiss seeing him wear his fedora. i miss seeing how he loves his little brother. I miss seeing how he loves his whole family. i miss him talking about doing extreme sports. i miss him making me eat things i don't like. i miss his shoes (weird). i miss the mischevious look in his eye when he thinks he has a brilliant idea. I miss how he looks dumb after he wasn't able to do something he thought he could :). I miss him bringing me pepermint ice cream on Valentines day. I miss how his nose runs (again.. weird but so true). i totally miss his notebooks and his black coat. and his love for the rocketeer and peter pan. well... you get the gist of it i think. I have to get over it. But how do you get over five years of being close to someone. how do you get over loving someone for five years? you don't! you can't just get over it. It eats at my mind and emotions everyday, even when i don't invite it. I regret breaking the friendship off, and i still miss him. And i am hurting every day anyway so it wouldn't have made a difference. At least i would have still had him in my life. I had to put my feelings out there somewhere. cuz i am going insane keeping it inside.
I will post something positive soon.... i promise!!
Today... life just sucks... and it's all my own doing.
So i feel like a looser who cant get through school. the worst part is that i am not even motivated to do anything. I can't go where i want to go because i can't afford it and i can't quit my job. I am forced to go to a school that i hate with a firey passion. I suck at school. etc. but i guess i will take what i can get and go to a loser school that i hate so very much. I am using that as motivation to get done a fast as possible with my associates so i can get the hell out of there. hard to get done really fast when i have a full time job and everyone else working there are already going to be taking a lot of time off work to go to school themselves. So i get to do lovely night classes... that will make my already non existant social life even more unattainable. I know, i am just complaining. Everything will be okay. I think in my current depressive state i am being more dramatic than i need to be. So let's turn this frown upside down.
I am starting school again after a year break. and then a 2 year break before that school year. I am going to pass all of my classes so i can get out of that hell hole of a school. and i am going to take as many night classes as i can handle (one or two at first and see how it goes form there) I WILL eventually move away from where i am now. And i WILL get to Utah State someday. I will go to different singles ward, even if i have to use a different address to get there. I am not a stupid worthless human being like i have been thinking i was. okay. so that is it. my thoughts are all over the place tonight. I am not the best writer and not the best blog poster. :P but oh well. until next time.
I am starting school again after a year break. and then a 2 year break before that school year. I am going to pass all of my classes so i can get out of that hell hole of a school. and i am going to take as many night classes as i can handle (one or two at first and see how it goes form there) I WILL eventually move away from where i am now. And i WILL get to Utah State someday. I will go to different singles ward, even if i have to use a different address to get there. I am not a stupid worthless human being like i have been thinking i was. okay. so that is it. my thoughts are all over the place tonight. I am not the best writer and not the best blog poster. :P but oh well. until next time.
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Somebody That I Used To Know
What is it with songs and reminding me of my past today. gosh! i like this song! Correction.... LOVE this song.
So I Set the World on Fire. :)
I don't know why, but the first time i heard this song, it reminded me of my friend let's call him ELMER! :P I super duper love this song. Enjoy my friends. enjoy.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Starting over
So my Fiance and i broke up a couple of weeks ago (mutual decision and i am okay). My friend set me up on this blind date for tonight. I am nervous SOOOOO nervous. Honestly i haven't "dated" in over a year. I was with a boyfriend since December of 2010 broke up in may 2011. Then came july and i hadn't dated at all since my breakup and then i went on one date with My ex-fiance and we have been together from july until two weeks ago. so i am very VERY out of practice with dating. i am so afraid i can't remember how to date. I'm afraid that i will make all of the first date mistakes. ugh... I hate dating :P Starting over. it isn't easy. BLEH!! now there is my little two cents for my blog :P it has been a long while since i have posted.
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